CNHI News Service

Opinion

February 26, 2013

Dealing with divorce -- find some help

—  

“Hear the whisper of the raindrops,

Blow softly against my window,



Make believe you love me,



One more time

"For the Good Times”

– Kris Kristofferson (hits for Ray Price and Elvis Presley)

“For the Good Times” hit the charts about the time my mother and father divorced. For the rest of his life, it was one of dad’s favorite songs.

In 2006, after my first marriage ended, it became one of mine.  

The song resonates because it pays homage to good memories.   

On the other hand, it’s easy post-divorce to be obsessed with looking back. Although the song focuses on happiness, post-divorce reflection often breaks down into bitterness, anger, finger-pointing and name-calling.  

Not only has the divorcee gone through hell, they can’t seem to get past it.

That is where  James Stillwell comes in. His job is to help people learn from their past, but focus on the future.

Stillwell, based in Lexington, Ky., is a master of divorce recovery.  

A happily married grandfather and father of four children, he did not learn about divorce firsthand, but it’s hard to knock his street cred.

Along with an impressive academic background,  Stillwell has helped more than 3,000 individuals and families through the divorce recovery process.

I have referred several friends and clients to his divorce recovery workshops and others to receive individual and couples counseling.  

All rave about his services.    

Stillwell  told me that it’s hard for him to go out in public and not run into someone who tells him, “You saved my marriage” or “You helped me get through the worst period of my life.”

Job satisfaction has to be high on James Stillwell’s list. He truly makes a difference.

He is an incredibly nice man with the perfect demeanor to be a counselor. He has read and mastered every book ever written on relationships and knows when to drop his knowledge into an individual situation. He comes from a background in the ministry, but his outlook and services are non-denominational.    

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